Otter and I had the privilege of attending an amazing, heart-opening event last evening.  When I was pregnant with her, I met Katie Hess and Lisa Reinhardt at an event for The Bump.  That "chance" meeting introduced the power of flowers and intentional chocolate into our lives, for which I am forever grateful.

Whether you are pregnant, birthing or postpartum, this book applies to you.  It applies to anyone who is breathing space and wanting a more meaningful life experience.  Katie and Lisa's vision to change the world with flowers has found it's most recent expression through Katie's book, Flowerevolution.

I first became of Katie's work-in-progress when one of her assistant's contacted me about including my testimonial in the book.  I had written it after using the flower essences through Otter's pregnancy and birth journey.  What a thrill to see it included in the finished product!!

There are a few book launch FLOWER LOUNGE events coming up.  Check HERE to see if there is one coming to a city near you...I know that CA and FL are on the list. Then do whatever you can to get there.

The evening was magical from start to finish.  We were welcomed into the space with a flower mandala.  There were flowers along every walkway, and yes, even in the restrooms.  

There was delicious libation with optional flower infusion, delicious gifts from Mother Earth to eat, and there were flower reading stations for the guests to enjoy.  Every solid space for sitting was ensconced with flower petals and candle light.

The evening started with an introduction and an invitation to meditate by Lisa Reinhardt, creator of Wei of Chocolate.  Her vegan, fair-trade chocolates are infused with Lotus Wei flower essences.  Both she and Katie have studied meditation, and we were treated to a wonderful two-minutes of mindfulness, breathing and being at the pace of chocolate.

She welcomed Katie to take the stage.  Katie share the trailer for her book, and then spoke more about the inspiration for this labor of love to take fifteen years of working with clients and traveling around the world to connect with flowers into a master work.  Anyone can pick up this book and connect with the healing power of flowers. Now you don't need to live near a garden or grow your own flowers to receive their beneficial energy. Even though after experiencing this book I think many will be inspired to plant a small garden, albeit a pot garden in a windowsill - prepare to be enlivened and inspired to take action.  

Thanks to the masterful skill and the talented eye of photographer and filmmaker Louie Schwartzburg, the pictures in the book come alive in your living room.  He was the final person to take the floor last evening.  

There are not enough words to describe the wonder and awe with which he filled the audience.  His dedication to capture the small, the vast, and the incomprehensible for the human eye, slowing it down for our speed, left me in greater wonder at this amazing space we live in.  It filled me with hope that since Nature is much bigger and than we are, with stewardship and care, we have an instruction guide to build a safer place for our children. We just need to slow down enough to try and grasp her language and learn her lessons.

I highly recommend the book - you can watch the trailer at the Lotus Wei website and order from Amazon.  Even if you are not ready to take the flower power journey, it is a stunning work of art with countless beautiful images to bring beauty into your day.

Here is a photo journal of our evening:

The final piece of Lisa's meditation was to have us take out the flower card in our gift bag and reflect on any messages we were receiving as we meditated on the flowers around us.  Then the Lotus Wei crew walked among the audience to collect all the cards.  The cards were then placed on a table at the exit.  Each guest was invited to take a message card on the way out the door.  Otter picked this one for us.  Pictured underneath it is my flower message that I received this morning when I used Part 2 of the book to continue my own #flowerevolution journey:

The material included in this video is for informational purposes only. It is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The viewer should always consult her or his healthcare provider to determine the appropriateness of the information for their own situation.  Krystyna and Bruss Bowman and Bowman House, LLC accept no liability for the content of this site, or for the consequences of any actions taken on the basis of the information provided.  This blog and video contain information about our classes available in Chandler, AZ and Payson, AZ and is not the official website of The Bradley Method®. The views contained in this video and on our blog do not necessarily reflect those of The Bradley Method® or the American Academy of Husband-Coached Childbirth®.   

 Birthing From Within and Bradley Method® natural childbirth classes offered in Arizona: convenient to Chandler, Tempe, Ahwatukee, Gilbert, Mesa, Scottsdale

Whether you have a long labor, a short labor, or something in between, there will come a time when you have to draw within yourself to gather the energy you need to see your birth through.  This was definitely my favorite affirmation - mantra really - as we hit the point in labor when there was barely time to let go of all the tension before another contraction started again.

I envisioned the energy around me as a vortex, and as I inhaled I swirled energy into me and as I exhaled I sent all my tiredness and tension away.  It was really a neat vision as I entered the "the zone".

We have been teaching Bradley Method® classes long enough to have the privilege of having alumni students come back and take another series as they are expecting their next child.  We have one of those couples in our current class, and something came up in class that made me reflect on our births.

The class topic last week was stages of labor.  We talked about the markers of the different stages of labor, how to identify “transition” that typically happens between first stage (cervical dilation and positioning baby) and second stage (pushing to birth), and how to manage the different stages of labor.

Our alumni mom mentioned that she was never able to let go of the discomfort of feeling like she had to have a bowel movement.  She wasn’t able to dilate any further until they got to the hospital and she got an epidural.  The epidural relieved that feeling for her, and she dilated from 5cm to 10cm in one hour.  When she was able to let go of that sensation and the fear of losing control, her body got busy.  She is retaking our class because although she liked her epidural, she knows that the less drug exposure to baby, the better.

It made me reflect back on our birth experiences.  Although I never asked for drugs, I look back and wonder what would have happened if I had given up control of our births a lot sooner.  I imagine they would have been more in line with our 18-hour birth of our biggest baby.  All 11 pounds and 1 ounce of Night Owl, arrived in the early morning after being left alone to labor with the support of Coach Bruss and our doula.  We had eaten, slept, stayed hydrated, and his was our easiest birth.

After that, we had our two longest births, ironically, at the time when we were training to become a Bradley™ instructors, and after we were certified as instructors.  

It seems that the more I “knew”, the less able I was to let go.  I was so busy analyzing, worrying about taking pictures that we could use in class, wondering how I would be perceived by my peers and our students, that I added untold layers of emotional baggage that Bruss would have to work me through.  I had to surrender to the fact that natural birth is all about relinquishing judgment and control, and accepting that we were going to allow my body and our baby the birth that they needed.  Once I hit that point of complete release, both of those children were born within about 5 hours of that turning point.

I want to share what I now know to be my birth mantra, just in case it can help another mama have an easier birth.  As much as I would love another go at putting this into practice (and have a labor sprint instead of marathons!), it feels like our family is complete, so I hope you will benefit from it for a better birth for you and your baby. 

Accept:  There is no one right way to birth.  There is no one right way to feel.  The most important thing to evaluate is am I (Mom) okay?  Is our Baby okay?  If so, then accept that this is your birth and carry on.

Surrender:  Surrender to your thoughts.  Surrender to the sensations.  Surrender to the feelings.  Birth is much bigger than we are.  It is timeless.  It is the way our bodies were designed to work for childbirth.  Be okay with losing control over the process.

Give In:  Give into your thoughts.  Give into your sensations.  Give into your feelings.  Do you want to cry?  Cry.  Does moaning feel good?  Moan!  Do you want to rock, roll, walk, move, gyrate, sway, just lay still?  What are your body and your baby telling you to do?  Release all worry about judgment from outsiders, release yourself from your own judgment of what you can and can’t do.  Allow yourself to give into your birth and see where it takes you.

Let Go:  Let it all go.  Any preconceived notions of your birth.  Your timeline.  The clock.  Your plan A, plan B, and the other plans you had – let them go.  Focus on being in the moment with your partner.  Focus on being in the moment with your baby – you cannot relive or redo these sensations later.  Let everything go, and *go* for the ride. 

Let God:  Being a spiritual person, there was always an emotional component for me that involved prayer, and appealing to a higher power.  Once I gave up my control and turned it over to God, labor seemed to flow smoothly and resolutely to a birth.  The birth of another of His miracles, of which Bruss and I got to play a small part.  It is so humbling to realize that I am not in control, and I don’t have to be, in order for birth to happen.  

When I gave into my body, our baby and our God, all things fell into place and we ended up having beautiful birth experiences, albeit long ones.  In the midst of those long labors, the idea that got me through the time with patience and without resorting to drugs to ease the sensations of labor was “We are allowing my body and our baby the birth that they need.” 

While there in nothing wrong with having a long labor, and we usually “win” the long labor comparison conversations (there is that judgment again!), I really do not wish long waiting times to meet your baby on anyone.  Think about these mantras if you need them, and I wish you all the best for a beautiful birth experience!!

Did you have any mantras when you were in labor?  What were they?

We had a simple question come up in class last night that we have never been asked before…usually we get to the material before hand and the question answers itself.  Since the mama asked it though, I figured that a good topic for today’s post is a written answer to her question.

The topic of last evening's class was "Introduction to Second Stage Labor".  This is the point in The Bradley Method® class series when we introduce the labor stage of transition, second stage, and then the basics of pushing in regards to breath and positions.

 

Question:  What do I do if I have the urge to push but my care provider tells me it’s not time to push?

 

Answer:  You won’t know if it’s time to push unless you confirm that your body is ready.  There are several things you can do to keep from pushing if the time isn’t right. 

 

Reasons why we have encountered that you shouldn’t push:

You are not completely dilated – pushing against a cervix that is between baby and the vaginal outlet can cause the cervix to swell, possibly leading you to go down a different path toward the birth.

 

You are not completely effaced – also called the “lip of cervix”. The danger in this situation is catching the cervix between the vaginal wall and the baby’s body, possibly tearing the cervix.

 

In a hospital setting: Your care provider isn’t there yet and the nurse doesn’t want to catch the baby.

 

What you can do to keep yourself from pushing:

Keep your chin off your chest.  Pinning your chin to your chest is a great way to trap air and put more power behind your diaphragm.  Great for pushing – not so great if you want to keep baby in.  So look up at the ceiling, sing, talk, tell a joke – do something that keeps your mind off the urge to push.

 

Get on your hands and knees.  Other supported flat back and knee position that keeps some of the pressure off of the anus and tells your body that it’s time to push might work too.  You can put some pillows under your chest; or if you are in the hospital, raise the head of the bed and lean against that.  This can also be an effective pushing position when mom arches her back, so no guarantees on this one.

 

Get lower to a shoulder to knee position.  This moves the baby’s head off the cervix using gravity, and you can do this as long as it’s comfortable for mom and baby doesn’t react negatively.  Reading up on it for today’s post, it is not recommended in late labor, so if you are going to do this, think about doing it under supervision and with monitoring.  It is noted to help relieve pressure if the cervix is already starting to swell and you can take a few contractions in this position to see if it helps with the swelling.  If it does, then you can probably go back and do the upright labor positions.

I strongly urge you to read more about this position before you go into labor - it is useful in many situations when used appropriately.  There are three links listed at the end of this post.

Do an asymmetrical squat for a few contractions.  We used this position with great success to get rid of a lip of cervix.  We did it right up on the hospital bed, supported by a squat bar. (If only I knew then that I would be writing about childbirth in the future...I would have let someone take a picture!)  If you don't feel comfortable doing this on your knees, you can do it on the side of a bed or use a chair.  It will let you keep one foot on the ground while you lean into the raised leg, imitating the position without putting extra weight on the knees.  Last note on this - if leaning into one side doesn't feel comfortable, switch the knees up/down and try the other side.

 

I will end with this cautionary statement: if you are having an undeniable urge to push, it’s advisable to find a care provider to check your dilation before you start pushing.  The last thing you want to happen is to push against a cervix that isn’t dilated and cause swelling.

 

Hire a care provider you trust so that if and when they tell you not to push, you believe them and you do what you need to do.  They may have other ideas that will work - these are just the ones we share in class.  And when it is time to push, get ready, because you are about to enjoy one of the sweetest rewards for hard work – holding your sweet baby!

 

A little anecdote:  It is not always necessary to check dilation before you push; however it’s important to know the possible consequences of doing so.  Since I am an experienced birth mama, my midwife let me push without checking my dilation.  She did ask me if I felt any pinching, and since I did not she went ahead and let me push.  I share this not because I want moms to push without being checked, but to illustrate the point of hiring a care provider you trust.  We have had one student start to push without being checked (nurse didn't believe that she was ready), and she ended up with a swollen cervix that led to other choices down the line.

 

 

Disclaimer: 

The material included on this site is for informational purposes only.
It is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The reader should always consult her or his healthcare provider to determine the appropriateness of the information for their own situation.  Krystyna and Bruss Bowman and Bowman House, LLC accept no liability for the content of this site, or for the consequences of any actions taken on the basis of the information provided.  This blog contains information about our classes available in Chandler, AZ and Payson, AZ and is not the official website of The Bradley Method®. The views contained on this blog do not necessarily reflect those of The Bradley Method® or the American Academy of Husband-Coached Childbirth®.

I am grateful to Jennifer and Devin Hanson for giving me permission to add their birth story to our Birth Story Archive.  Their generosity is premiering our first twin story.  They have an inspiring story that is a testament to faith and belief in your body, your coach and your birth team.

 

Jennifer was also kind enough to share some thoughts about Bradley Method® classes, care providers and life as a momma of twins.  Read our “virtual interview” below the links to her birth story.

 

The story of the Hanson twins begins with a momma of twins who wanted a natural birth and was ready to do whatever it took to avoid an induction.  Although their due date was October 10, 2011, since she was carrying twins, she was told they would be considered term on September 20, 2011.  I have great respect for her midwives at Valley Women for Women who allowed her to go “past due"...twice.

 

What would you do if you were 40 weeks plus four days pregnant?  You may have seen this already…if not, try this if you can…I know I would have a hard time accomplishing this not pregnant!

Momma went into labor naturally two days after their labor dance, and here are links to her birth story. 

"After many months of preparing and learning (using mainly the Bradley Method®), we were able to achieve the natural, unmediated childbirth that we had hoped for. We had a beautiful, peaceful labor and a delivery that can only be described as "dramatic" but one which God's hand of protection was completely involved in every step of the way. We also have to thank our incredible team of nurse-midwifes who took such wonderful care of us during the pregnancy and allowed us to let the twins come when they were ready (which happened to be 6 days past their estimated due date) and encouraged us to still go for a natural birth, even though Isaac was breech until around 38 weeks (when he turned on his own). Truly, I can not say enough positive things about midwife care - personal, encouraging, sensitive, relaxed and fun. I've honestly missed those ladies since we've had the twins - something I would never say about any other health care provider I've ever had. "

 

"While my labor was calm and peaceful, with me being completely in-tune with my body and in-control of what was happening to me, the delivery was chaotic and stressful, with me being so distracted that I couldn't even tell when contractions were happening. I felt out-of-control to the point of panic at times. It was not at all what I had envisioned when I pictured the delivery of my sons, however I believe it would have been far worse had our midwife Belinda not stepped in to fight for us amidst the chaos of doctors and hospital politics. (I should mention here that the OB practice we went with offered something called "collaborative care" with twins. We were to be cared for and delivered by midwives, but a doctor would be available should an emergency arise.)"

 

SPB: What did you take away from The Bradley Method® classes that helped you in your birth?
JH: I think what I took away from the Bradley® classes was confidence that what I believed (that my body was designed to birth children) could line up with reality, even in a hospital birth. And that I had the right to advocate for the kind of birth I felt was best for me, my husband and our twins.

 

SPB: What did your husband-coach feel was the most important lesson he learned?
JH: Devin read a number of chapters in Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, which he felt was very helpful. The Bradley® classes reiterated what he had learned from the book. However, I felt going to the classes together helped me feel more confident in him as a coach and helped bring up some good conversations about "How will we handle ______ during the labor/birth/recovery."

 

SPB: Based on your experience, what advice would you give to pregnant women who are looking for a care provider?
JH: I would encourage women to find a midwife or a care provider that has CNMs working for them. We were so encouraged and supported by our midwives. They helped to build our confidence and helped us navigate the "politics" we dealt with because we were expecting twins and wanted a 100% natural birth. Now that the medical bills are rolling in from the hospital, I would also recommend hiring a midwife out-of-pocket and birthing at home or at a birthing center, it is very likely to be cheaper (and less stressful than the hospital!!) This is what we plan to do next time around.

 

JH: Life with twins is... a lot of work, but also a lot of fun. Weston and Isaac are adorable and I love being their mom. We get lots of attention when we go out, which took some getting used to. But now I've learned to be gracious, patient and polite to all their admirers and can enjoy it when people stop us. What's funny is that when I'm out with just one of the twins I get zero attention and now that feels weird. They are such sweet babies. In fact, as I'm typing this I can hear Weston waking up and laughing/cooing to himself - he is a big time morning person and it brightens my day so much to start the morning with his cooing and smiling. Isaac kinda hates waking up, but once he's awake he showers me with morning smiles too.

To read more of Jennifer's writing, you can visit her blog:

Do you have a birth story you would like to share? 

Please contact me at [email protected] if you would like to share your recollections for our Birth Story Archive.

 

 

We are now enrolling for our Spring Series

March 5, 2012 to May 21, 2012

 

For more information or to register, please call us at 602-684-6567 or email us at [email protected]

Oh my gosh – our baby is really almost here!!  The reality hit home when one of our midwives and one of her students visited our home Wednesday morning.

 

Some reasons for the home visit:

~It’s a test run to make sure they can find the home and can plan for alternate routes if necessary.

~It gets them familiar with the “lay of the land” so that they know their way around the home during the birth.

~It gives them an opportunity to check in with the family in their own space.

~They encourage the family to invite whomever else they have invited to the birth to meet them and have the family get a sense of the “crowd”.

~It gave us the chance to talk a little more about our birth plan and any concerns we have about our birth. 

 

It was a little rushed since we had another appointment afterwards, and I could have kicked myself that I forgot to take pictures…ah, well.

 

I realized through the course of the visit that I have yet to accept that this baby is going to be born here.  That we really and truly will not have to go to the hospital this time still seems so surreal!!

 

It was so nice to have our former Bradley® teacher and friend Andrea here with us during the visit.  She has attended several homebirths and is very familiar with the process.  I am going to lean on her confidence since she was there at our last birth, and I know she knows that we know how to birth.  I just have to get there myself and believe that we can do this.

 

Here are some of the things we talked about:

What our vision is for our birth?

Peaceful and uninterrupted by a transfer

 

Where do we picture ourselves laboring and birthing?

As long as the weather breaks (we are still over 100° F in AZ), I envision spending a lot of time outside enjoying our beautiful courtyard and in the backyard watching the kiddos play.  Otherwise we will take comfort in the sanctuary of our bedroom.

 

Do we think we are going to use the tub? 

I want to just because I have never been able to use it before.  Since my bag of waters has ruptured before contractions started with our first three births, our previous doctor and the hospitals would not sign off on submersion for fear of infection.  Henci Goer addresses this in her book, The Thinking Woman’s Guide to a Better Birth and she offers study-based evidence that these are unrealistic concerns.

 

What are our expectations from our care providers?

Open lines of communication.  Bruss emphasized that he is looking forward to not having to go to the hospital and seeing our labor stall.  By the same token, he wanted reassurance from our midwife that if they do see any signs of concern, that they will let us know in plenty of time to make a Healthy Mom, Healthy Baby decision.

 

They wanted to know where they could set up their supplies, and where we would be laying out our supplies.

 

They also checked in to make sure that we had plans for our children:  who would be keeping an eye on them so we could focus on the birth, and how were they feeling about the homebirth.  I can honestly say that when we were under traditional OB care, we were never asked about how our children were being prepared for the upcoming birth.  Even though most children are not going to attend a hospital birth, they are still important people in the family that need to be considered in the planning and welcoming of the newest family member.

 

Who will be at our birth?

So far, we have Andrea as an Assistant Coach to help Coach Bruss, and our photographer to capture this momentous occasion with her artistic eye.  We are still going back and forth on a videographer. I would love to have a well-filmed video to submit to the American Academy of Husband-Coached Childbirth™ so that other students could benefit from a birth filmed in the 21 century!  There is no question that it would be neat to capture the kiddos reactions on film and watch it on baby’s birthday; and maybe someday have the courage to show to our own students.

 

It became apparent why they encourage families to invite anyone who is going to be at the birth to the home visit.  The midwife, her student and our friend Andrea were here with Bruss and I…not present were my aunt who is helping with the kiddos and the photographer.  With just the five of us, I am already feeling like there are too many people and we still haven’t counted the potential videographer and the possibility that some of my other aunts will come over to help with the kiddos, too.  If the baby comes on a Monday, our cleaning ladies will be here…if she comes on a Friday, the landscape crew will be around…noise and people and distractions that we hadn’t thought about!!

 

Here is the info they shared with us:

Many people are surprised at how “hands-off” the midwives are at a homebirth.  If they see that a couple is working well together, they try to be unobtrusive and do their monitoring discreetly.  They will step in and be more active as needed, but for the most part they want to allow the families to work together and allow labor to progress without interruption.  Their responsibility is to make sure mom and baby are well through the process, and of course they get involved as the time to push arrives and during the postpartum period to make sure mom and baby continue to do well.

 

My favorite part of the visit was having the kiddos join us on the bed when we did our prenatal exam.  It was so neat to have them around me as we checked on the baby.  They got to hear her heartbeat and ask questions.  They were touching my belly and giving me kisses.  They sang a song for the baby.  If this is an indication of our family birth, it’s going to be awesome.

 

One of our midwives speaks Spanish, so she was talking to the kiddos about the baby and asking them question in Spanish during the exam.  I would love it if the first language our baby hears is Spanish welcoming her into the world!!

 

 

 

 

We are actively working on preparing our kiddos (ages 6, 4 and 2) for our homebirth since we are at 35 weeks now.  Here are some of the things we are doing:

 

1.  We are watching birth videos with them at night so that they have an idea what it might look like, sound like and how we are going to work together to have the baby.  One of my favorites is “Children At Birth” by Hathaway Productions and distributed by the American Academy of Husband-Coached Childbirth®.  This shows five different births attended by siblings, all with different levels of involvement by the siblings.

 

2.  We are talking about what “working” looks like. We ask them to show us what they look like when they work hard.  We ask them questions like, “What kind of faces do think Mommy might make if she is working hard?”   As it turns out, our social studies and Bible study lessons the last week have been focusing on how the Holy Trinity works together, and it’s making a great tie-in to how our family is going to get to work together to welcome our baby.

 

3.  We are talking about how the birth will progress from start to finish.  We have shared with them the different stages of labor and what we may or may not be doing, and if they feel like they want to help, how they can help us. 

 

4.  We talk about how there is probably going to be some fluid and maybe some blood that comes along with the baby, and they have gotten to see that on the videos.  One of the very important things for me to emphasize with them is that if at any point they don’t like what they are seeing or if it’s not something they want to see in person, that they can come and go as they want.  We tell them they are welcome anytime and they can leave anytime.

 

5.  We are doing relaxation practice so they can see how Bruss talks to me and touches me.  We allow them the opportunity to be involved or not.  Pretty soon we will need to step it up to a labor rehearsal so that they can understand how long a minute is when Mommy is having a contraction.  I think it will seem longer to them than it will to me!

 

6.  We are going to make a list of things that will be likely to happen when we go into labor on butcher paper and hanging it in our schoolroom for us to review and revise as we have different thoughts.  On the list are things like: who is going to come over to watch them, what they can do while Mommy and Daddy are in labor, that the midwife will come as labor progresses, etc.  We made one of these lists when we were expecting our second child, and looking back NOTHING happened as per the list except that we left without a baby and came back with a little brother from the hospital.  I don’t know what will happen according to our new list.  I think the point is to give the kiddos some sense of what to expect to ease anxiety and the unknown, and to that end, it is worth the exercise.

 

7.  We have told them how we labored in the past and how I might get to a point when I don’t want to talk and I don’t want to be touched as we get to what is called “transition”.  We follow with the statement that this will probably mean that the pushing work is near and that we will want to get to this point so we can meet our baby very soon!

 

What I have found fascinating about this process is that the kids want to know if the births they are seeing is their birth, which then leads to us showing them their birth story pictures.  I am learning that our children are very interested in how what they are hearing applies to them, which is important to remember as I teach them not just about childbirth, but life itself. 

 

In the last two days we have seen an interesting behavior shift in our home.  I wonder if they will feel reassured that their place in our family is secure if we make an effort to consistently tell them how they fit into the picture stories we are telling them.  It would be a relief to see our generally sweet children show up again.  

We have our home visit with the midwives tomorrow.  This is our first time ever doing this.  I will write about that on Friday since I know we are among the growing number of people choosing homebirth.  This is all new to us and we are excited to be able to experience this and share it with you.

As a reminder, our fellow teacher, Rachel Davis, AAHCC is going to write an in-depth look at sibling preparation while I am on "maternity leave".  I am looking forward to having her share her great information with you! 

 

What do you think – how did you prepare your children for the arrival of their next sibling?  For those of you that had a homebirth, did you have any pleasant surprises in your children’s involvement or reactions? 

 

 

 

There is no rewind button or re-do when it comes to your labor.  Your body will provide you the opportunity for a “dress rehearsal” if you have Braxton-Hicks contractions or some bouts of pre-labor (labor that starts and stops without a progression to the birth of your child) to practice the techniques you have learned throughout your Bradley® series.  We encourage our students to take advantage of these for what they are: opportunities to practice, rather than a reason to get discouraged.  It’s all about your frame of mind.

 

If you are sitting with your coach having dinner, watching television, or wherever you happen to be, and you feel a tightening in your abdominal area before your due date, practice relaxation!  In regards to pre-labor, I understand that telling you to treat it as a practice opportunity might be a contradiction to the idea of “don’t pay attention too soon”.  The idea is that if your contractions are ten minutes apart or more during a time of day when your coach is around, and after an hour they are not getting any closer, then take the next hour to practice different relaxation techniques with each contraction.  If after an hour they are still not any closer, more intense, and the duration has not increased, get some rest – you are probably not in labor.  Your body and your baby might be going for a “test drive”, however, neither is ready for actual labor.  And if you are in labor, it’s going to be a while – get some sleep!

 

Why is relaxation so important?  I imagine that no one who has been through an un-medicated birth would say that her experience was pain-free.  What we will probably tell you is that all the discomfort was instantly forgotten the minute we held our beautiful children in our arms.  In order to make it through the discomfort of late first stage labor and the doubt and discomfort that arise with the transition phase of labor, you and your coach must be masters of relaxation. 

 

When it comes to going through labor without pain medication, you have to be able to relax three components of your body: your body, your mind, and your emotional state.  You have to relax your body so that only the muscles that are working through labor tense up – namely, your uterus.  If you allow more parts or your whole body to tense through a contraction, you will get exhausted quickly and feel a lot of pain with every contraction. 

 

You have to be able to relax your mind so that you focus on the positive.  Physiologically, each wave that passes through your uterus is working to bring you closer to meeting your baby.  On the other hand, if you are thinking, “Oh my gosh – this hurts!” or, “How long can I take this?” you will find that you lose your confidence and your resolve before you hit transition.

 

Lastly, you have to be able to relax yourself on an emotional level.  This means that you have confidence in your coach to help you through labor, that you feel safe in your birth place, that you are ready to face your labor, you are ready to be a parent, and that you are COMMITTED to a pain-med free birth as long as things progress in a healthy, low-risk manner towards a Healthy Mom, Healthy Baby outcome.  I put the word COMMITTED in caps because you have to decide with no “outs” to have a labor free of interventions unless they are medically necessary.  I am not passing judgment on keeping pain meds on the bottom of your list.  As we say in yoga, “It is what it is”. 

 

The reason we believe in training couples to give birth without intervention is because according to the American Academy of Pediatrics, Committee on Drugs, “No drug or chemical – whether prescription, over-the-counter or food additive – can be regarded as having been proven to be entirely free of potential harm to the fetus.” (Pediatrics, Vol. 51 No.2)  Despite this statement, some people are more comfortable with the idea of using an epidural than others. 

 

I can report from an anecdotal perspective that if you keep it as an option “on the table”, you are likely to go down that route through the course of your labor.  I am so grateful that our students that do choose an epidural make good use of their relaxation training and seem to be able to put it off until the end of their labor.  Since their babies are not exposed to the epidural drugs throughout the entire course of labor, most of those babies have been born vaginally with good color and ready to nurse.

 

If, however, you are sure that you do not want to have an epidural and you want to avoid as many interventions as possible throughout the course of your labor, you will want to practice relaxation techniques at every opportunity.  If you can relax and stay calm at home, then you can put off going to the birth center or hospital if you are birthing outside of your home.  The longer you labor at home, the more likely it is that you will get to your birth place at the tail end of your labor – hopefully just in time to welcome your baby.  If you get there too soon, you may be subject to well-meaning care providers who want to “help things along”.

 

Along those lines, if you are birthing outside your home, retaining a level of deep relaxation is important as you transfer (read more).  The goal is to maintain your level relaxation despite the change in location.  By doing this, you minimize adrenaline in your system, and you are less likely to experience a slow down or stall in your labor due to the “fight or flight” instinct.  Again, this reversal in your labor may be discouraging to you, and it also brings on the “help things along” interventions, which tend to lead down the path to continued interventions – it’s a slippery slope.

 

I will close by adding that there are certain warning signs you and your coach do not want to ignore.  Among them, if you develop a fever, if there is heavy, uncontrollable bleeding, a foul-smelling or dark colored discharge, if you experience excruciating pain that does not ebb and flow with a contraction: it is time to call 911 and/or get yourself to a medical facility as soon as possible.  These are not normal in a low-risk pregnancy or labor, and we would never counsel our students or readers to ignore these warning signs in order to preserve the sanctity of their natural birth experience.  Our ultimate goal as Bradley® Method instructors is to help families have Healthy Mom, Healthy Baby outcomes, and if that means medical intervention to save one or both of their lives, then those interventions are well used.

 

I hope that this gives you some points to ponder and that it motivates you and your coach to practice your relaxation and run through some practice contractions on a daily basis until you welcome your baby on their birth-day.  Whether or not you can join a Bradley Method® class series, the book Natural Childbirth the Bradley® Way, by Susan McCutcheon, outlines some wonderful relaxation practices that you and your coach can use to prepare for your baby’s birth.

Read More:

 

 

 

As I sit here and write at 10:15 pm, understand that this post is also written as a piece of advice that I need to follow as we get closer to our estimated due date…

If you are working outside of the home when you are pregnant, it is somewhat easier to convince yourself to get some sleep.  You know what is required of you at work, and you make an effort to get to sleep in the first place.  Or, if you tend to wake up in the middle of the night, you know it’s imperative for you to rest so you can function the next day…so you make an effort to go back to sleep.

When you have other children to care for, getting rest becomes more of a challenge.   They have needs and wants that must be met.  With more people in the house, come more chores that need to be done: more dishes, more clothes that need to be washed, a bigger mess that needs to be swept…you get the idea.  If you are a stay-at-home mom like me, you also have meals to get creative with three times a day, plus healthy snacks to prepare…It’s a big temptation to take advantage of quiet time when your kiddos are sleeping to get things done despite the fact I know that I would be better of getting rest so I am fresh for the next day.

I remember that for my first pregnancy, I would stay up late at night watching the crazy shows and scrapbooking and generally not getting sleep.  It was a decision I came to regret as I ran out of energy at the end of our labor.  We learned the lesson the hard way with an intervention that wouldn't have been necessary if I had given into my tiredness and slept when my body asked me to sleep during labor. 

We feel it is very important to start conserving your energy and making sure you get enough sleep as you get into the third tri-mester.  For one, your baby is having another growth spurt.  This means that your body is spending energy not just making your growing baby, but nourishing them with the extra oxygen and nutrients they need.  If you feel like you need a nap, take it!  You will be better for it in the long run.

We encourage our Bradley Method® students to start getting as much sleep as possible when they reach 35 to 36 weeks.  Although science tells us we can’t “catch up” on sleep, I would make the analogy that you want to treat it like a savings account.  You want to “bank” as much sleep as you can.  Since you don’t know if and when you are going to go into labor, you want to act as if each night is your last opportunity to get a good night’s sleep.

The first truth is that once your labor starts, it will be hard to convince yourself to sleep if it’s your first time baby because you are so excited; no couple believes that they are going to be the ones with a long labor.  The second truth is that you will not get very much sleep after your baby arrives.  Most of our students who come back to tell their birth stories, they say things like, “Sleep?  What’s that?”  Most of them report that it takes 2-4 weeks to get into a routine that includes longer periods of sleep for mom or dad.

If you are an expecting mother, I would encourage you to learn how to fall asleep when you practice relaxation with your coach.  Work at training your body to completely relax at the sound of your coach’s voice and under his touch.  If you can do it well, then you are more likely to be able to fall asleep when he relaxes you during your labor.

How do you keep from getting too excited?  Coach can time a couple of contractions and if they are 10 to 20 minutes apart, convince yourselves that you are going to have a long labor, and remember that you want to have energy for the hard work at the end of labor.  Remind yourselves of all the interventions that you want to avoid.  Your body will be more efficient if it is rested than if it is tired.  Therefore the more tired you are, the more likely you are to be offered, and to be tempted to take, the interventions you want to avoid in the first place.

I rarely give you a list of don’ts, however here are some important ones in early labor when your contractions are more than 10 minutes apart: don’t bake, don’t clean, don’t go for a walk, and don’t stay awake if your water breaks first.  Just go to sleep!  Active labor is defined as strong contractions that are 3-5 minutes apart.  I promise that you cannot sleep through these stronger contractions if you are un-medicated.  You will wake up in time to participate in your birth!

What you can do is eat to appetite and drink to thirst before you take your nap.  Then you and your coach go to your “nest”, darken the space and do a good relaxation so that you can sleep.  It is also advisable for your coach to get some sleep; he will be working as long as you are actively working in your labor.

Once you wake up from that good nap, then you can bake, clean, walk – do things that will distract you from labor and also things that start to stimulate your labor.  You will be more ready to face your labor calmly when you are rested and ready to work.

As your labor progresses, you may find it is taking a while longer than you expected despite a good nap at the beginning.  If and when you feel your energy waning, it is a great time to work together with your coach to get extra rest.  This is one of the reasons why it’s important for coach to rest – it will be his or her job to time your contractions faithfully and nudge you to full consciousness 15-30 seconds before the next contraction begins.  

You can close your eyes and rest, or if you are really tired, you will find that you can actually fall asleep and take little power naps.  Even if you only get 2-3 minutes of rest between contractions, you will find it feels amazingly restful.  With enough of these little naps, you can handle the stronger contractions of late first stage with the strength and calm necessary for this phase of labor.  For that reason, sleep is one of the ways you can avoid unnecessary pain in labor.  You can also gain the energy you need for transition and the pushing phase of labor.

This is also a reason why some couples opt to hire a doula.  In the event of a long labor, the coach and the doula can take turns resting themselves.  This way someone full of energy is always awake coaching mom, lending her energy and providing comfort measures.

I wish we had a clear-cut way to predict the length of labor when it starts.  If this was true, then we could tell who needed to get some sleep and who could stay awake for the duration of their labor.  Since there is no way of knowing for sure, I encourage you to please do everything you can to sleep in the weeks leading up to your labor, and do your very best to take a nap before your labor starts gets into the active phase!

If you already had your baby, what was your experience with sleep and labor?  Do you have any advice to share with first-time parents?

Today is Mother’s Day in Mexico.  Since our roles as a mother can stand another day of recognition, I figure why not – let’s have another day of good wishes.  I will start off by wishing all the moms a Feliz Día de las Madres! 

 

We had an incredible birth story over the weekend, and probably one of the most intriguing ones we will have as instructors of The Bradley Method®.  With the mom’s permission, I am going to share their birth story today.  Their baby was born at 35 weeks and both mom and baby are doing well.  The dad “caught” their daughter as mom was getting out of the hotel bathtub!

 

One of the topics we cover over the course of the series is Emergency Childbirth.  We do this for the “just in case” instance when a couple has an unintentional unassisted birth.  Let me be clear that The Bradley Method® does not endorse unassisted deliveries, meaning that a conscious decision is made to not have a trained professional present at the birth of a child.  However, the American Academy of Husband-Coached Childbirth® acknowledges that sometimes parents don’t recognize the signs of labor (especially first-time parents) and babies will come when they are ready.  Our curriculum addresses this circumstance in recognition that it is better to give some basic information about how to handle this situation rather than leaving a mom and her coach unprepared for the outside chance that they find themselves having to deliver their child outside of their planned birth setting.

 

In one of life’s little twists, I had just been loaned the text “Emergency Childbirth: A Manual” by Gregory J. White, M.D. on Friday.  It is recommended reading for all Bradley instructors and I started reading it over the weekend.  The Bradley Method® designed their Emergency Childbirth class section from Emergency Childbirth, a joint publication of the U.S. Department of Defense, Office of Civil Defense, the U.S. Department of Health, Education and Welfare and the American Medical Association.  Little did I expect to hear yesterday morning that the class information was put to good use by one of our students!

 

When I first shared the story with mom’s classmates, the other moms were incredulous.  How could she not know she was in labor?  Was her labor short?  Was labor going to be so easy that their babies are just going to appear without a big fanfare?

 

Well, this is the story as best as I can put it together for now.  I still haven’t gotten to hear the story from Mom and Dad together – when we do, I will film it and add it to our Birth Story video archive.  Here is Baby Caroline’s Mother’s Day birth story:

 

Mom and Dad had been planning and practicing for a homebirth with a midwife.  They decided to take Bradley Method® classes so that Dad would know how to coach mom through labor while the midwife attended to mom’s and baby’s needs as the labor progressed.  Their hope was that the Mom’s mother would also be in town as an assistant coach.  Either way, Dad was ready to be Mom’s go-to guy.

 

Mom was woken up on Friday morning by a strong sensation in her abdomen.  In Arizona, per statute R9-16-108 (see Reference 1), a midwife cannot attend a birth unless mom is between 36 and 42 weeks of gestation.  Since Mom was only at 35 weeks gestation and their midwife was heading to Florida to see her grandchildren, she decided not to pay attention to the tightening.  She also had a conversation with her sister who is studying to be a midwife and failed to mention the tightening to her.  Looking back, Mom reflected that she didn’t want to be told to go to the emergency room, so she decided to move on with her day.

 

Saturday found the couple down in Tucson spending time with Dad’s family and enjoying the Mother’s Day holiday weekend.  Mom was baking bread with her sister-in-law and SIL noticed that Mom was pausing every once in a while.  Mom told her SIL she was having some contractions but she was only 35 weeks, so it couldn’t possibly be labor, right?  SIL concurred that it was probably just her uterus getting ready for labor. 

 

After celebrating Mother’s Day with Dad’s family on Sunday, Mom and Dad were getting ready to head up to Phoenix for Dad to attend a conference.  Mom finally had a contraction that took her breath away, and she told Dad, “Let’s use this one to practice our relaxation.”  Dad agreed and started with a back rub, moved to the front where mom curtly told him “Don’t touch my uterus!”  He continued with a back rub and then worked his way forward again and Mom had to tell him not to touch again because it was too uncomfortable.  (Students:  what phase of labor is she in?)

 

Mom admits upon looking back now that she was just in denial.  They made the drive from Tucson to Phoenix and got to the hotel.  Mom felt a gush of water and thought that she had wet her pants.  She was hot and sweaty and she threw up once they were in their hotel room.  (Students:  what phase of labor is she in now?)  She was very uncomfortable and decided to lie down.  She told Dad that she must have a really bad case of food poisoning and that the best thing to do was lie on her side and be still and relax through the terrible discomfort she was experiencing.  Dad did his best to comfort mom at this time and stayed by her as she was in bed.

 

All of a sudden, Mom declares that she has to have a bowel movement.  She sat on the toilet and was pushing, but nothing was coming out of her anus.  She checked and couldn’t believe that she couldn’t pass this painful stool.  Mom and Dad agreed that a bath would help Mom relax her muscles and then maybe she could relieve herself.  So Dad drew the bathwater and Mom got in.  Dad reported that Mom felt instantly relief in the water, so that made them feel better.

 

Well, the next thing they know, the bath water turns red.  Now the couple is truly concerned and they call 911.  Dad reports that the 911 dispatcher “didn’t buy” the constipation story and told Dad to have Mom get out of the water and see if he could see the baby’s head. 

 

Mom lifted herself out of the water, and Dad reports that in the very next instant, Baby Caroline made her appearance.  Dad caught their daughter and it was official – not only was he a Bradley Dad, he became a Bradley Dad who caught the baby!

 

Mom relayed that the next few minutes were very peaceful.  Baby Caroline did not cry, yet she was breathing on her own and very alert.  She says that they admired their daughter and held her and enjoyed their incredible accomplishment – their new baby and her incredible birth story.  When they got to the hospital, Baby Caroline was declared to be a 10 on the Apgar scale and she weighed in at 5 pounds, 5 ounces. 

 

What did Mom and Dad do well as per the instructions we cover in class? 

- They stayed calm, and Dad reassured Mom that everything was okay (although Dad says if we hear the 911 tape it will sound like he “lost his mind”). 

- They kept their hands away from the birth canal. 

- They verified that their daughter was breathing well after she was born and put her face down on Mom’s abdomen to stay warm. 

- When the baby was crowning, they did not pull on her, they just let her be born naturally. 

- They did not pull on the cord and let the placenta (afterbirth) come naturally. 

 

They ended up going to the hospital in an ambulance and have had many unwanted interventions due to their “unsterile” birth.  I am happy to say that after two very trying days at the hospital, the family finally seems to be getting the support they need and hope to be released with their very healthy baby girl tomorrow. 

 

I want to thank the family for allowing me to share their incredible birth story with you.  I hope that you can read this and recognize that childbirth without drugs is possible, and that if you don’t pay attention too soon, you can manage most of your labor without too much trouble.  Mom slept both Friday and Saturday nights because she ignored her labor!  She looks great, has good energy and her body is busy making food for their baby thanks to the rest she got during their labor.

 

As I mentioned earlier, The Bradley Method® does not endorse unassisted deliveries.  An experienced childbirth couple probably would have recognized the signs of late first stage and/or transition and gotten to their chosen birthplace with ample time to deliver with a trained assistant.  In this couple’s case, they were too far from home to make it there and their midwife was not available, so their birth plan would have changed to a hospital birth at the last minute.  I am so happy that “all’s well that ends well” and that Baby Caroline will have a very unique birth story to share for the rest of her life!

 

 

References:

 (1) http://www.azsos.gov/public_services/title_09/9-16.htm#Article_1

 

 

Disclaimer:

The material included on this site is for informational purposes only.

It is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The reader should always consult her or his healthcare provider to determine the appropriateness of the information for their own situation. This blog contains information about our classes available in Chandler, AZ and Payson, AZ and is not the official website of The Bradley Method®. The views contained on this blog do not necessarily reflect those of The Bradley Method® or the American Academy of Husband-Coached Childbirth®.