Chandler, Arizona
Sweet Pea ​Births
Sweet Pea ​Births
...celebrating every swee​t pea their birth
...celebrating every swee​t pea their birth
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Nursing In Public
Posted on August 23, 2011 at 1:23 PM |
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Nursing in public (“NIP”) with confidence is something that
takes time and practice. It also helps
to have a supportive partner with you. Bruss
was always so helpful and encouraging. In our days as first-time parents, he would sit next to me and hold the cover while I figured out how to access the breast and latch our baby. He would sit right there throughout the nursing, chatting with me as if there was nothing abnormal about what I was doing. Then
the day arrived when we were out, just our baby and me, and our baby was
hungry. When that day came for the first time, I just dug deep within my
reserves and told myself I could do it – and we did. The apologist breastfeeding mom in me has disappeared. As I mentioned in a previous post, I did
everything possible to hide when I was breastfeeding Ysabella in public in an
effort not to offend anyone around us. Nursing Brussito was a little different because we hardly
went out after his RSV scare. I got very
comfortable nursing uncovered since we hardly ever left the house and had very
few visitors. When we did have people
over, I had to feed him uncovered since he was not used to hiding behind a
cover; and he would fidget instead of nurse.
That led to finding secluded corners in public places so that I could
nurse him uncovered without offending people.
I mostly used the cover to shield him from other people than I did to
hide my nursing “parts”. The cover still
went with us everywhere, mostly used for a blanket or a towel instead of a
nursing cover. Which led to a total transformation as I nursed Bryan. We still used covers in his early months to
keep people away from him before he was six months old. As he got older and more interested in his
surroundings, all the beautiful nursing covers my aunt had made me fell into disuse
as I got more comfortable with nursing in public. I started getting brave and proudly breastfed our baby without
a nursing cover when a bottle-feeding mom at our children’s swim school got my
ire up. I figured if I could nurse at
the swim school uncovered, I could nurse in other settings uncovered. As I like to say now, I can nurse in public
and show less skin than a lingerie model, or most models for that matter, who
bare their skin in advertisements and storefront displays. A friend of mine related one of my favorite anecdotes about
breastfeeding. It was the first time I realized that seeing and learning about breastfeeding normalizes the experience for
children. She never nursed her children,
so they were fascinated by the fact that I nursed ours. They got to see me nurse Brussito when we had
play dates. Much to the mom’s
embarrassment, they would peek under the nursing cover to see what was going
on. I would tell them that that I made
milk for him, and they were seeing a baby drink the special food that I made
just for him. After a couple of months
of seeing him nurse, they started nursing their baby dolls! It really drove home the idea that if
children (and people in general) see breastfeeding in action, then they begin
to understand that it is normal and acceptable; and it is a behavior that children will repeat and hopefully carry over to their own children. There is only one circumstance when I will still use a
nursing cover: in church. Even then I am
resistant and want to push the boundary sometimes. For goodness sakes, I think, the baby Jesus
breastfed, and I know that Mary did not have a nursing cover. I am guessing he got hungry when the
shepherds and the wise men were visiting.
I don’t know enough about Jewish culture to know if she would have
excused herself and gone to another part of the stable…but I do know that he
probably got to eat when he was hungry – there was no formula available back
then!! Out of respect for the fact that people
in church may expect “modesty” I do try to be mindful that this might not be a
good time to freak them out. I have also realized through the course of writing posts and
finding relevant links for Breastfeeding Awareness Month that when I nurse our
next child, it is well and good to unashamedly and proudly feed her in front of our
other children no matter what the setting.
Beyond that, I need to tell them and show them how breastfeeding
works. Both of our older children loved
to watch as I nursed Bryan, and I am sure that their interest will be piqued
again as we welcome our newest Sweet Pea this fall. As the opportunities present themselves, this
time around I will show our older children how we latch, what good feeding
looks like, and show them the difference between colostrum and established
milk. Not only will Ysabella have the opportunity to learn and
hopefully remember some of the mechanics involved if and when she has her own
children, but maybe our sons will be of some help when their partners want to
feed their children. If our sons have
children, I can only imagine the look on our daughter-in-laws faces when our
sons instruct them on how to breastfeed! Disclaimer: The material included
on this site is for informational purposes only. It is not intended nor implied to be a
substitute for professional medical advice. The reader should always consult
her or his healthcare provider to determine the appropriateness of the
information for their own situation. This blog contains
information about our classes available in Chandler, AZ and Payson, AZ and is
not the official website of The Bradley Method®. The views contained on this blog do not necessarily reflect those of The Bradley Method® or
the American Academy of Husband-Coached Childbirth®. |
Are you a lactivist?
Posted on August 16, 2011 at 6:37 AM |
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Fromthe Wikipedia topic, “Lactivism” “Lactivism
(portmanteau of "lactation" and "activism") is a term used
to describe the advocacy of breastfeeding. Supporters, referred to as "lactivists", seek to promote the
health benefits of breastfeeding over formula-feeding and to ensure that
nursing mothers are not discriminated against. Another form of lactivism is simply acting as support for
mothers that wish to breastfeed. Some mothers may not have the information
necessary to succeed, and some have been provided incomplete or misleading
information by healthcare professionals, friends, family members, and others
that have no experience with breastfeeding. This support often also includes
help for mothers who initially had a hospital lactation consultant that opted
for formula at the first sign of difficulties with feeding.” From the Urban
Dictionary On-line 1. A lactivist is a lactation activist: someone who
considers him/herself an advocate for breastfeeding, whether or not s/he's
nursed. Lactivism comes in many forms: choosing to breastfeed, choosing to
breastfeed for an extended period of time, choosing to breastfeed in public,
choosing to smile at a breastfeeding woman, encouraging other women to
breastfeed, educating the public on the benefits of breastfeeding, lobbying for
pro-breastfeeding legislation, etc. 2. a woman who nurses her child in public as a protest
against people uncomfortable with seeing breastfeeding. How is this for an interesting point: as I was looking up
the definition of “lactivist” on the Internet to see how my personal beliefs fit
into the definition, I did not see Merriam-Webster pop up as a link. I deliberately went to their site to look up
the word, and got the message, “The word you've entered isn't in the
dictionary.” As the next step in raising
awareness, our goal as breastfeeding families may be to see this word entered into an “official”
dictionary. Anyway – back to the topic at hand…do you think you are a
lactivist? The more we teach the Bradley
Method® and see how these babies thrive on breastmilk, the more convinced I am
that I am going to have to start wearing breastfeeding tee-shirts to raise
public awareness on the overwhelming benefits of breastfeeding. I have evolved from a nervous mom who, as Debbie Gillespie likes to
say, covered up from the neck to the ankles in order not to offend anyone. I would pump like crazy before a plane trip
so that I could bottle-feed Ysabella in case breastfeeding was “inconvenient”
during our ride. I would politely agree with people that chose not to breastfeed (non-medical reasons) that their babies would be fine on
formula in the long run. I would even
wear a nursing cover in our own home when people were visiting! In looking at my transformation from an apologist to a
lactivist, the setting that motivated me to take a stand for breastfeeding was
our children’s swim school. Before Bryan
was old enough to swim, we would take the two older kiddos to their classes and
I would sit with Bryan in the observation area.
There was another mom with an infant who always bottlefed her baby. I know enough to recognize the thick white
color of formula – not that the powder in the bottle wasn’t a giveaway. On top of that, she didn’t always hold her
baby when she gave him the bottle. It’s one thing to stop nursing for medical reasons, which as
I learned from Dr. Newman, are few and far between when a mom has had a good birth, good help and good support. Not knowing this mom’s story, I was appalled
that maybe even with a good reason, this mom was not only compromising her baby’s
gut, immune system, and intelligence, but that she did it so carelessly!! If you are going to supplement or replace
your milk, I feel that you could at least look your baby in the eye and give
them your love if you are not able or willing to nurse them. The way I approach it, being a lactivist is not about baring
skin or daring people to challenge me.
It’s about the fact that our breasts are physiologically designed to
feed our children. We have allowed
prudishness on one end of the spectrum, and sexualization on the other end, to
dictate how and when we use our breasts to feed our children. I, for one, am finished with nursing covers. I want to reiterate that I can nurse in
public and show less skin than a lingerie model, or most models for that
matter, who bare their skin in advertisements and storefront displays. I love my nursing tops with built in flaps
that I use as I lose my pregnancy weight, and my Modest Middles nursing tanks
that let me nurse wearing any stretchy or front opening blouse in my wardrobe
to nurse. I am comfortable in my own
skin if I accidentally flash a nipple or flesh in public while my baby
latches. I am joining my fellow
lactivists in making “breasts = feeding” the norm in our society. Over the year of teaching Bradley Method® classes and
sharing the benefits of nursing with other families, and expanding on my own
knowledge of breastfeeding with La Lache League Meetings, additional reading
and training, I also feel motivated to inform people that formula is not, and
never will be an adequate substitute for breastmilk. In my book, the formula companies are criminally
responsible for compromising the health of generations of children by
promulgating the notion that their science is equal to our incredible design. Equally complicit in this great lie are the hospitals that do not support the choice to breastfeed, or that do not teach new mothers how to keep their milk supply up when their babies are born prematurely or they have had traumatic birth experiences. In answer to my own question: Yes, I am a lactivist, and
proud of it. Related Links: How Your Breasts Make and Deliver Milk from Dr. Sears.com In case you are interested, here is the ordering info for the tee-shirt pictured above: Disclaimer: The material included
on this site is for informational purposes only. It is not intended nor implied to be a
substitute for professional medical advice. The reader should always consult
her or his healthcare provider to determine the appropriateness of the
information for their own situation. This blog contains
information about our classes available in Chandler, AZ and Payson, AZ and is
not the official website of The Bradley Method®. The views contained on this blog do not necessarily reflect those of The Bradley Method® or
the American Academy of Husband-Coached Childbirth®. |
Successful Breastfeeding
Posted on August 2, 2011 at 1:39 AM |
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-
FitPregnancy.com In conjunction with Breastfeeding Awareness Month, I will be
featuring breastfeeding links on our Sweet
Pea Births Facebook page. Please
check it for updates on breastfeeding articles, classes, research, resources,
information and promotions. Today I want to share with you the ways we have found success
in our endeavor to breastfeed our children.
I use “we” and “our” because the breastfeeding relationship between a
mother and child is the most successful when the Coach is supportive and
invested in the decision to breastfeed (see research link below). Although breastfeeding is a physiological behavior, like
natural childbirth, it is a learned behavior.
Many of us played with baby dolls and bottles growing up as children; very
few of us got to see how the mechanics of breastfeeding works. If we had siblings that were breastfed, it is
likely that we were too young to remember the specifics of what we observed, and
unlikely that our mothers told us “how” they latched on for productive and
painless breastfeeding. I was fortunate to be old enough to witness my mom
breastfeeding my brothers since I am 13 and 15 years older than they are. I remember how sweet they looked snuggled up
to her breast, and how fulfilling it was for her to nourish them. My decision to breastfeed our own children
was a very easy one to make. Bruss also
knew his sister breastfed his niece and nephew, so it wasn’t a foreign concept
to him, either. Formula feeding was not
an option that we seriously considered. There are three factors that helped us succeed in our commitment to breastfeed our
children: 1.) The information we received on the benefits of
breastfeeding. 2.) The commitment we made to feed our baby with the food
that is designed just for them: human milk for human babies. 3.) We learned how to breastfeed in public – this required a
commitment at a different level – I had to get comfortable with being
uncomfortable!! Information The first time we were exposed to the benefits of
breastfeeding was in the Bradley Method® class we took with our first
pregnancy. The ones that appealed to us
were: healthier mom, healthier baby, getting more sleep, the money saved, the
portability and ease of travel with a baby, the opportunity for our child to
have a higher IQ…the list is a long one.
See the links at the end of today’s post for a couple of lists of
benefits. In addition to learning about the benefits in class, part of
the homework for any Bradley Method® student is to attend at least one La Leche
League meeting to learn about peer support.
As instructors we encourage our students to try and attend at least two
meetings before the birth of their baby so that they are familiar with the
leaders that are available to them for support before or after baby arrives. We did our homework and attended a meeting together – there
are several meetings in the area that are “Dad-welcome” meetings. You can call the Leader and check in if you
have any questions about bringing your Coach to a meeting. When our daughter, Ysabella, arrived we started
breastfeeding within an hour after she was born. What we had learned through our Bradley
classes but didn’t insist on as first-time parents is that skin-to-skin contact
is the most conducive to successful newborn breastfeeding. We let the “baby nurse” whisk her away to do
her newborn care while the doctor worked on me.
Once we were reunited, our doula helped us latch on for the first time
and hence, we started to learn about the mechanics of breastfeeding. Since then, we have insisted that we hold our children first
– the nurse can come back later after we have done our bonding. A newborn can find their way to the breast
and latch on without any direction or encouragement. It was so awesome to have our boys start
nursing without hesitation within minutes of being born. I had inverted nipples before I started nursing Ysabella, so
our postpartum nurse suggested that we use nipple shields to encourage my
nipples into the “correct” shape for breastfeeding. They are not comfortable or attractive, and
since then we have also learned that there is some controversy about their
use. Luckily, there was no lasting
damage from using the shields during our hospital stay, and they did work to
bring my nipples out in the right direction for Ysabella to nurse. Commitment What we weren’t prepared for was the pain of engorgement, or
the pain that was associated with latching on.
No one told us about the likelihood that the first 7-10 days of
breastfeeding would be difficult, or how it might hurt along the path of
learning to breastfeed properly. It was
so painful that I was brought to tears every time I nursed. I made Bruss take all the formula samples out
of the house to remove any temptation to take the easy way out. Due to our experience, we are frank with our
students about these possibilities, and along with that, we equip them with
resources so that they can persevere through the initial challenges and develop
the mutually beneficial breastfeeding relationship with their child. Since our initial experience, we have learned that latching-on
should not be painful. Our chiropractor
says, “Just because it is common doesn’t mean it is normal.” As he likes to tell our students: breasts are
a matched set – they are of similar size, shape and texture. The milk coming out tastes the same – one
side isn’t chocolate and the other vanilla!
If your baby seems to prefer one side to another, or if breastfeeding is
painful on only one side, consider having your baby checked by a pediatric
chiropractor for subluxations that may have occurred during childbirth. Even with an un-medicated, uncomplicated
vaginal birth, the tight squeeze through the vaginal canal may have pinched a
nerve or changed the alignment of the spine.
This may cause your baby discomfort when they are placed in the
breastfeeding position, causing them to latch improperly or to squirm in the
opposite direction, thus giving the impression that they “don’t like” to nurse
on one side. My easiest transition to full-time breastfeeding was with
our third child, Bryan, who we had checked at 10 days old. Dr. Ross checked him, did a minor adjustment,
and voila, the pain in my left breast during latch-on never happened
again! To be clear, he does not adjust a
child as he would an adult. He uses a
tool called “the activator” to do the adjusting. Even with that tool, he puts his thumb
between the tool and the baby so it is a very gentle process. I will be sure to take pictures when he
adjusts our newest arrival so that you can see what I am talking about. Going Public The last factor of learning to breastfeed was getting comfortable
nursing outside of our home. We decided
to nurse “on-demand” – when Ysabella was hungry, I responded to her cues by
feeding her. This being the case, it
meant that if we were going to leave the house, I would probably have to feed
her at some point before we made it back home. Our Bradley Method® instructor suggested our first “tip” for
public breastfeeding: whenever I nursed
in public and Bruss was with me, he would put his arm around me to show his
support. It was extremely comforting to have
his physical touch as a demonstration and encouragement that it was okay to
nurse and he was behind me 100%. Nobody told us about the second aspect – how do you do it
discreetly? The first time I tried it
was a disaster…how do you maneuver a blanket, a bra and a baby at the same
time? Luckily, I was with a friend who
helped me hold a blanket up while I tried to open my nursing bra and get
Ysabella into a good nursing position.
That same day, I observed another nursing mom wrap a corner of a blanket
around her bra strap to hold it in place and then do all the rest of the
maneuvering. Since then, nursing covers
have come onto the market – they are a handy little mother’s helper if you are going to cover up! I say “if”
because I have become less and less inhibited with each child. Do not mistake that for indiscretion – I
still show less skin when I nurse in public than a lingerie model baring her
breasts for the entire world to see in a mall window display. What I have become comfortable with is the
notion that my breasts were made for feeding, and there is no shame in allowing
my child to nurse freely, without being uncomfortably hot underneath a blanket
or cover. I also feel that as a
“lactivist”, I can do my part to further the cause of breastfeeding and the recognition
of it as “natural”. Hiding behind a
cover to do what nature intended will not further the acceptance of the
anatomical function of breasts for feeding. I hope this inside view into a brief summary of our
breastfeeding experience will help you find the path to your breastfeeding
success. Watching our children thrive on
my milk during infancy and beyond is one of the most rewarding aspects of my
motherhood. I wish that same success and
fulfillment to mothers everywhere. Disclaimer: The material included on this site is for
informational purposes only. It is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical
advice. The reader should always consult her or his healthcare provider to
determine the appropriateness of the information for their own situation. This blog contains information about our classes available in
Chandler, AZ and Payson, AZ and is not the official website of The Bradley
Method®. The views contained on this blog do not
necessarily reflect those of The Bradley Method® or the American Academy of
Husband-Coached Childbirth®. To Find a La Leche League Meeting Phoenix Area Worldwide Benefits of Breastfeeding Dr. Sears – Top to Bottom: Compilation of Medical Studies: Dads and Breastfeeding Support |
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