Sweet Pea Births

Chandler, Arizona

Sweet Pea Births

...celebrating every swee​t pea their birth

Blog

Mental Relaxation

Posted on March 31, 2012 at 4:55 PM

Bradley Method® natural childbirth classes offered in Arizona: Chandler, Tempe, Ahwatukee, Gilbert, Mesa, ScottsdaleCoaches Corner
Today's post is from Bruss' perspective.  He led class on Monday and told a story he had never shared in a class setting before...here it is along with an introduction that shares the line of thinking that went along with the story...

An important part of The Bradley Method® (some say the most important) is relaxation.

The superficial view I had of relaxation going into our first Bradley class and subsequent birth was that of *physical* relaxation. Krystyna and I were/are regular Yoga practitioners and my mental picture of relaxation was the final Yoga posture where one lays prone on the floor after a hard workout where the only option is total physical relaxation. In my own mind I thought that getting Krystyna to the physical state of relaxation was the goal/benefit to her in pregnancy and labor.

The Bradley Method® instructs various methods of physical relaxation to the couples and encourages them to explore others that are meaningful to them. Among the methods are message, stroking, hot showers etc.

Combined with physical relaxation, The Bradley Method® teaches the importance of emotional and mental relaxation. Initially I considered these relaxation themes of less importance than physical relaxation. My thought process was if I can help get Krystyna to relax *physically* than the other relaxation components would take care of themselves. 

I have come to find out through our Birth experiences as well as the dozens of students that we have help teach/mentor that my initial approach to relaxation in pregnancy and birth was exactly backwards.

Physical relaxation is the *end* result and dependent on emotional and mental relaxation, Mom needs to be in a good emotional state, accepting of the baby and ready (as possible) to take on her labor, ready to be a Mother, has effectively dealt with any family dynamic issues *prior* to going into labor or any other *emotional* issues that may impact Mom's readiness for labor and beyond. 

As a strong compliment to emotional relaxation, Mom's ability to focus her mental energies effectively in pregnancy and labor can dramatically effect the outcomes for better or worse. I think of mental relaxation is the ability of Mom to affect her state of mind positively to overcome any externalities such as physical discomfort, emotional and environmental challenges.

What I have found through experience is that if Mom is not relaxed emotionally and is not able to focus her mental energies positively then *physical* relaxation is all but impossible. Conversely, by concentrating on emotional relaxation and positive mental focus then physical relaxation seemingly just happened and labor was able to progress more effectively.

.....

So what does all that mean?

For me as a husband and labor coach, what this means is that I have to (1) understand the importance/impact of emotional and mental relaxation to pregnancy and labor and (2) be ready, willing and able to effectively work/communicate with Krystyna on these components of relaxation during pregnancy, labor and beyond.

......

I'll end the post with a story from our first labor.

In our first labor Krystyna's water broke and labor contractions started soon thereafter. We went to the hospital after 6-8 hours and labored there for another dozen plus hours. While we were out walking the halls attempting to get labor to progress, Krystyna visibly became chilled and shaky. I reached up to her forehead and, sure enough, she was warm and very likely running a low grade fever. Krystyna told me, adamantly, 'do not tell the nurses/doctor that I have a fever or they're going to give us a C-section'.

OK, here I am as first time father, birth coach, with little or no experience, what to do?

Here's what went through my mind at the time.

1. Fever is sign of infection and potentially very dangerous to Krystyna and baby (we didn't know boy or girl yet)

2. Krystyna is *very* mentally strong and her mind is completely set on an intervention *free* labor and delivery.

3. Krystyna is *very* emotionally invested in this labor being natural and intervention free.

4. My last thought before coming up with a plan was I need to be careful how I handle this. Krystyna is very tired after 20+ hours of labor and on edge. If I don't handle this correctly there's a chance that she will just give up and then we're highly likely to be getting a C-section.

So here's what I did.

I told her that she was doing such a great job and was laboring really, really well. I also reminded her that she worked so hard in preparing for the birth with nutrition and education and I was *proud* of everything that she had done for our child. She was/is the absolutely the best and that I love her.

Next I looked at her and told her that she/we had done all these things to have the best outcome possible and the end goal of all this work was ultimately for her and the baby to be healthy and happy.

Then and only then did I tell her that the fever was dangerous. It was dangerous to her and the baby. And that we were not going to *hide* the fever from the birth team because that would go against our primary goal of having her and the baby be healthy.

Then I said that I was there for her and that we were going to do this *together* regardless of what labor interventions we might be faced with even if that meant we were looking at a C-section.

After that conversation we walked back to the room and told the nurse that we likely had a fever and started to discuss the options. The option we chose was to start a penicillin drip to take care of any infection. Several hours later (and 2 more interventions) Krystyna delivered Ysabella vaginally. Mom and Ysabella were healthy and Krystyna and I were *very* happy.

So my role as a coach in this birth was to help Krystyna deal with the emotional and mental challenges in being faced with medical interventions in labor despite her *very* strong emotional and mental investment in a natural, *intervention* free birth. In my opinion the emotional and mental aspects of this birth were the primary challenges that we had to get past *together* so that Krystyna could relax physically, let go and deliver Ysabella into this world. 

In the moment and in retrospect it was one of our very best days as husband/wife and new *parents*.

Bradley Method® natural childbirth classes offered in Arizona: Chandler, Tempe, Ahwatukee, Gilbert, Mesa, Scottsdale
Disclaimer:  
Bradley Method® natural childbirth classes offered in Arizona: Chandler, Tempe, Ahwatukee, Gilbert, Mesa, ScottsdaleThe material included on this site is for informational purposes only.
It is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The reader should always consult her or his healthcare provider to determine the appropriateness of the information for their own situation.  Krystyna and Bruss Bowman and Bowman House, LLC accept no liability for the content of this site, or for the consequences of any actions taken on the basis of the information provided.  This blog contains information about our classes available in Chandler, AZ and Payson, AZ and is not the official website of The Bradley Method®. The views contained on this blog do not necessarily reflect those of The Bradley Method® or the American Academy of Husband-Coached Childbirth®.


Categories: Birth Story, Bradley Method® outcome, Bradley® Coaches, Coach's Corner, Coaching, First stage labor, Hospital Birth, Infections and Pregnancy, Natural birth, natural labor coping mechanisms, Natural labor coping techniques, Obstetrical Care, The Bradley Method®, The Bradley Method® classes, The Bradley Method® pain management, Variations and Complications, Why we chose the Bradley Method® childbirth classes

Post a Comment

Oops!

Oops, you forgot something.

Oops!

The words you entered did not match the given text. Please try again.

177 Comments

Reply moncler
1:23 AM on September 2, 2021 
I wanted to put you that very small note to be able to give thanks over again with the magnificent basics you've discussed at this time. It is really tremendously open-handed of people like you giving publicly what most people might have offered as an electronic book in making some bucks on their own, notably since you could have done it if you decided. These tricks in addition served to be a easy way to fully grasp many people have a similar desire the same as my own to realize significantly more when considering this problem. I know there are lots of more pleasant moments in the future for those who looked at your website.
moncler http://www.monclercoat.us.com
Reply yeezy 700
1:23 AM on September 2, 2021 
I must express my thanks to you just for rescuing me from this problem. After looking out throughout the world-wide-web and obtaining solutions that were not powerful, I thought my life was done. Existing minus the answers to the difficulties you have solved as a result of your main review is a crucial case, as well as the kind which could have badly damaged my entire career if I hadn't come across your web page. Your personal understanding and kindness in taking care of almost everything was tremendous. I am not sure what I would've done if I hadn't come across such a thing like this. It's possible to at this moment look forward to my future. Thank you very much for your professional and amazing guide. I will not be reluctant to suggest your web page to any person who desires guidelines on this matter.
yeezy 700 http://www.yeezy-shoes.us.org
Reply moncler jackets
1:23 AM on September 2, 2021 
I am only writing to make you understand what a cool encounter my friend's girl had visiting your site. She even learned plenty of issues, with the inclusion of what it's like to have an amazing teaching mood to get folks smoothly know several tricky subject areas. You undoubtedly did more than people's expected results. Thanks for supplying these interesting, trusted, informative and even cool tips about the topic to Tanya.
moncler jackets http://www.monclerjackets.us
Reply yeezy 500
1:23 AM on September 2, 2021 
I wish to express my thanks to this writer just for rescuing me from this dilemma. Right after looking out throughout the the web and getting views that were not pleasant, I figured my entire life was over. Living without the presence of solutions to the difficulties you've solved as a result of the blog post is a critical case, as well as those that would have badly affected my career if I had not come across the website. Your training and kindness in touching every part was vital. I don't know what I would've done if I hadn't encountered such a stuff like this. It's possible to at this moment relish my future. Thanks so much for this expert and sensible guide. I will not be reluctant to refer your web sites to any individual who needs to have care on this situation.
yeezy 500 http://www.yeezy-500.us.com
Reply yeezy
1:24 AM on September 2, 2021 
I simply wanted to thank you so much yet again. I'm not certain the things that I would've worked on in the absence of the entire creative concepts documented by you concerning that area of interest. It truly was a scary dilemma in my circumstances, but coming across your specialised strategy you resolved it made me to leap over delight. I am thankful for this advice and then pray you are aware of an amazing job that you're carrying out training some other people via your web blog. I know that you've never got to know all of us.
yeezy http://www.yeezy-sneakers.us
Reply kevin durant shoes
1:33 AM on September 4, 2021 
I definitely wanted to jot down a small message to be able to thank you for these remarkable instructions you are giving out on this site. My time intensive internet research has at the end been recognized with good strategies to write about with my pals. I would repeat that we readers actually are undoubtedly blessed to exist in a magnificent community with very many lovely people with beneficial suggestions. I feel pretty happy to have come across your web page and look forward to tons of more amazing times reading here. Thank you once again for everything.
kevin durant shoes http://www.kevindurant-shoes.us.com
Reply supreme outlet
12:44 AM on September 12, 2021 
I needed to post you this bit of remark to thank you so much once again relating to the superb guidelines you've featured in this article. It's quite particularly open-handed with you to provide freely what exactly a number of people could possibly have supplied for an e book in order to make some bucks for themselves, particularly given that you might well have done it in case you desired. These tips in addition acted to become a great way to understand that someone else have the same fervor like mine to realize very much more with respect to this matter. I believe there are many more pleasurable periods ahead for individuals who check out your blog post.
supreme outlet http://www.supremeoutlet.us.com
Reply yeezy 350
12:22 AM on September 16, 2021 
Thanks for all your valuable labor on this web site. My daughter enjoys managing research and it's really easy to understand why. A number of us notice all regarding the powerful manner you offer efficient things on your web site and in addition cause contribution from other people on this content so our favorite girl is actually understanding so much. Take advantage of the rest of the new year. You have been carrying out a useful job.
yeezy 350 http://www.yeezy-350.us.com
Reply golden goose sneakers
12:20 AM on September 18, 2021 
I happen to be writing to make you understand what a really good experience my child undergone going through your web page. She figured out a good number of pieces, which include what it's like to possess a marvelous giving heart to make folks quite simply learn about chosen problematic subject areas. You truly exceeded people's expected results. I appreciate you for supplying such practical, safe, educational and even unique thoughts on your topic to Emily.
golden goose sneakers http://www.goldengooseofficial.com
Reply nike sb dunks
2:14 AM on September 22, 2021 
Thank you a lot for providing individuals with remarkably superb chance to read from here. It is always so useful and packed with a lot of fun for me personally and my office mates to search your site not less than 3 times in one week to learn the new secrets you will have. And indeed, we're always amazed with the fantastic pointers you give. Selected 2 tips on this page are honestly the most suitable I've had.
nike sb dunks http://www.sbdunk.us
Reply curry 7 shoes
2:14 AM on September 22, 2021 
I'm writing to let you be aware of what a brilliant discovery my cousin's girl went through browsing your webblog. She even learned lots of things, most notably what it's like to have a great coaching heart to make a number of people without hassle know specified grueling subject matter. You undoubtedly did more than visitors' expectations. Thanks for supplying these informative, trustworthy, educational and fun guidance on the topic to Julie.
curry 7 shoes http://www.curry7shoes.us
Reply yeezy 350
2:15 AM on September 22, 2021 
I as well as my guys have been reviewing the great guides located on your website and before long I got a terrible feeling I never expressed respect to the web site owner for those secrets. Those young boys came consequently passionate to study all of them and now have pretty much been enjoying them. Thanks for truly being simply considerate and for selecting varieties of tremendous areas most people are really desirous to understand about. Our own honest apologies for not saying thanks to you earlier.
yeezy 350 http://www.yeezy350s.com
Reply curry
2:15 AM on September 22, 2021 
I'm just commenting to make you be aware of of the useful experience my wife's child found going through your site. She noticed lots of things, including how it is like to have a great giving spirit to let the mediocre ones just learn about various problematic issues. You truly exceeded her expectations. Thanks for providing the productive, trustworthy, edifying not to mention easy guidance on this topic to Tanya.
curry http://www.curryshoes.us.com
Reply moncler outlet
2:15 AM on September 22, 2021 
I definitely wanted to write a brief word in order to appreciate you for those remarkable steps you are sharing on this website. My long internet search has now been rewarded with high-quality information to go over with my friends. I 'd declare that most of us site visitors are really lucky to live in a wonderful network with so many outstanding individuals with good pointers. I feel extremely happy to have encountered the website page and look forward to so many more fabulous moments reading here. Thanks once more for all the details.
moncler outlet http://www.monclercoat.us.com
Reply off white outlet
2:15 AM on September 22, 2021 
I have to express appreciation to you for rescuing me from this type of difficulty. As a result of exploring throughout the world wide web and seeing notions which were not helpful, I assumed my entire life was well over. Existing without the answers to the problems you have fixed by means of your short post is a crucial case, as well as the ones which could have adversely damaged my entire career if I hadn't noticed your web page. Your personal training and kindness in touching every aspect was invaluable. I am not sure what I would've done if I had not discovered such a step like this. I am able to at this time look ahead to my future. Thanks for your time very much for this impressive and amazing guide. I will not be reluctant to suggest your web page to any person who requires recommendations about this subject matter.
off white outlet http://www.offwhiteoutlet.us.org
Reply off white x nike
2:16 AM on September 22, 2021 
I needed to post you one very small remark in order to give many thanks the moment again for your breathtaking methods you have shown on this page. It's simply extremely generous of people like you giving unhampered precisely what some people would've offered for sale for an electronic book in order to make some cash on their own, and in particular given that you might have tried it in case you decided. Those techniques also worked like the fantastic way to comprehend the rest have similar dreams the same as mine to realize more and more with regards to this issue. I'm sure there are many more pleasurable sessions ahead for individuals that go through your website.
off white x nike http://www.nikexoffwhite.com
Reply moncler
10:53 AM on September 26, 2021 
I truly wanted to jot down a simple word so as to express gratitude to you for these magnificent items you are writing at this site. My incredibly long internet lookup has now been recognized with wonderful facts and strategies to write about with my companions. I would say that many of us site visitors are unquestionably fortunate to live in a remarkable network with many lovely professionals with beneficial suggestions. I feel rather grateful to have encountered the weblog and look forward to plenty of more pleasurable times reading here. Thanks a lot once more for everything.
moncler http://www.monclerjackets.us.org
Reply jordan 13
1:20 PM on September 28, 2021 
I definitely wanted to make a simple message to say thanks to you for some of the superb tactics you are showing here. My prolonged internet research has finally been recognized with reputable concept to share with my partners. I would claim that we visitors are unquestionably fortunate to exist in a great network with so many wonderful professionals with insightful advice. I feel quite privileged to have seen your weblog and look forward to tons of more cool moments reading here. Thank you once again for a lot of things.
jordan 13 http://www.jordan13.us.com
Reply yeezy
4:32 PM on September 30, 2021 
I really wanted to write a brief word to be able to express gratitude to you for these superb steps you are writing here. My rather long internet research has finally been recognized with really good tips to exchange with my relatives. I 'd state that that many of us site visitors are undoubtedly blessed to be in a perfect place with so many awesome professionals with great pointers. I feel rather privileged to have come across your web page and look forward to really more fabulous moments reading here. Thanks once more for all the details.
yeezy http://www.yeezysadidas.us
Reply nike off whtie
4:33 PM on September 30, 2021 
I together with my friends were actually analyzing the nice tips found on the blog and so then I had a terrible suspicion I never expressed respect to you for those techniques. My people ended up excited to see all of them and already have really been tapping into those things. Appreciate your turning out to be very considerate as well as for utilizing varieties of magnificent themes most people are really desperate to learn about. Our honest apologies for not expressing gratitude to sooner.
nike off whtie http://www.nikexoffwhite.com