Sweet Pea Births

Chandler, Arizona

Sweet Pea Births

...celebrating every swee​t pea their birth

Blog

Mental Relaxation

Posted on March 31, 2012 at 4:55 PM

Bradley Method® natural childbirth classes offered in Arizona: Chandler, Tempe, Ahwatukee, Gilbert, Mesa, ScottsdaleCoaches Corner
Today's post is from Bruss' perspective.  He led class on Monday and told a story he had never shared in a class setting before...here it is along with an introduction that shares the line of thinking that went along with the story...

An important part of The Bradley Method® (some say the most important) is relaxation.

The superficial view I had of relaxation going into our first Bradley class and subsequent birth was that of *physical* relaxation. Krystyna and I were/are regular Yoga practitioners and my mental picture of relaxation was the final Yoga posture where one lays prone on the floor after a hard workout where the only option is total physical relaxation. In my own mind I thought that getting Krystyna to the physical state of relaxation was the goal/benefit to her in pregnancy and labor.

The Bradley Method® instructs various methods of physical relaxation to the couples and encourages them to explore others that are meaningful to them. Among the methods are message, stroking, hot showers etc.

Combined with physical relaxation, The Bradley Method® teaches the importance of emotional and mental relaxation. Initially I considered these relaxation themes of less importance than physical relaxation. My thought process was if I can help get Krystyna to relax *physically* than the other relaxation components would take care of themselves. 

I have come to find out through our Birth experiences as well as the dozens of students that we have help teach/mentor that my initial approach to relaxation in pregnancy and birth was exactly backwards.

Physical relaxation is the *end* result and dependent on emotional and mental relaxation, Mom needs to be in a good emotional state, accepting of the baby and ready (as possible) to take on her labor, ready to be a Mother, has effectively dealt with any family dynamic issues *prior* to going into labor or any other *emotional* issues that may impact Mom's readiness for labor and beyond. 

As a strong compliment to emotional relaxation, Mom's ability to focus her mental energies effectively in pregnancy and labor can dramatically effect the outcomes for better or worse. I think of mental relaxation is the ability of Mom to affect her state of mind positively to overcome any externalities such as physical discomfort, emotional and environmental challenges.

What I have found through experience is that if Mom is not relaxed emotionally and is not able to focus her mental energies positively then *physical* relaxation is all but impossible. Conversely, by concentrating on emotional relaxation and positive mental focus then physical relaxation seemingly just happened and labor was able to progress more effectively.

.....

So what does all that mean?

For me as a husband and labor coach, what this means is that I have to (1) understand the importance/impact of emotional and mental relaxation to pregnancy and labor and (2) be ready, willing and able to effectively work/communicate with Krystyna on these components of relaxation during pregnancy, labor and beyond.

......

I'll end the post with a story from our first labor.

In our first labor Krystyna's water broke and labor contractions started soon thereafter. We went to the hospital after 6-8 hours and labored there for another dozen plus hours. While we were out walking the halls attempting to get labor to progress, Krystyna visibly became chilled and shaky. I reached up to her forehead and, sure enough, she was warm and very likely running a low grade fever. Krystyna told me, adamantly, 'do not tell the nurses/doctor that I have a fever or they're going to give us a C-section'.

OK, here I am as first time father, birth coach, with little or no experience, what to do?

Here's what went through my mind at the time.

1. Fever is sign of infection and potentially very dangerous to Krystyna and baby (we didn't know boy or girl yet)

2. Krystyna is *very* mentally strong and her mind is completely set on an intervention *free* labor and delivery.

3. Krystyna is *very* emotionally invested in this labor being natural and intervention free.

4. My last thought before coming up with a plan was I need to be careful how I handle this. Krystyna is very tired after 20+ hours of labor and on edge. If I don't handle this correctly there's a chance that she will just give up and then we're highly likely to be getting a C-section.

So here's what I did.

I told her that she was doing such a great job and was laboring really, really well. I also reminded her that she worked so hard in preparing for the birth with nutrition and education and I was *proud* of everything that she had done for our child. She was/is the absolutely the best and that I love her.

Next I looked at her and told her that she/we had done all these things to have the best outcome possible and the end goal of all this work was ultimately for her and the baby to be healthy and happy.

Then and only then did I tell her that the fever was dangerous. It was dangerous to her and the baby. And that we were not going to *hide* the fever from the birth team because that would go against our primary goal of having her and the baby be healthy.

Then I said that I was there for her and that we were going to do this *together* regardless of what labor interventions we might be faced with even if that meant we were looking at a C-section.

After that conversation we walked back to the room and told the nurse that we likely had a fever and started to discuss the options. The option we chose was to start a penicillin drip to take care of any infection. Several hours later (and 2 more interventions) Krystyna delivered Ysabella vaginally. Mom and Ysabella were healthy and Krystyna and I were *very* happy.

So my role as a coach in this birth was to help Krystyna deal with the emotional and mental challenges in being faced with medical interventions in labor despite her *very* strong emotional and mental investment in a natural, *intervention* free birth. In my opinion the emotional and mental aspects of this birth were the primary challenges that we had to get past *together* so that Krystyna could relax physically, let go and deliver Ysabella into this world. 

In the moment and in retrospect it was one of our very best days as husband/wife and new *parents*.

Bradley Method® natural childbirth classes offered in Arizona: Chandler, Tempe, Ahwatukee, Gilbert, Mesa, Scottsdale
Disclaimer:  
Bradley Method® natural childbirth classes offered in Arizona: Chandler, Tempe, Ahwatukee, Gilbert, Mesa, ScottsdaleThe material included on this site is for informational purposes only.
It is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The reader should always consult her or his healthcare provider to determine the appropriateness of the information for their own situation.  Krystyna and Bruss Bowman and Bowman House, LLC accept no liability for the content of this site, or for the consequences of any actions taken on the basis of the information provided.  This blog contains information about our classes available in Chandler, AZ and Payson, AZ and is not the official website of The Bradley Method®. The views contained on this blog do not necessarily reflect those of The Bradley Method® or the American Academy of Husband-Coached Childbirth®.


Categories: Birth Story, Bradley Method® outcome, Bradley® Coaches, Coach's Corner, Coaching, First stage labor, Hospital Birth, Infections and Pregnancy, Natural birth, natural labor coping mechanisms, Natural labor coping techniques, Obstetrical Care, The Bradley Method®, The Bradley Method® classes, The Bradley Method® pain management, Variations and Complications, Why we chose the Bradley Method® childbirth classes

Post a Comment

Oops!

Oops, you forgot something.

Oops!

The words you entered did not match the given text. Please try again.

231 Comments

Reply jordan 6
2:44 AM on December 23, 2021 
I wish to show appreciation to this writer for bailing me out of this particular difficulty. Right after looking out through the the web and getting ways that were not powerful, I was thinking my life was over. Living devoid of the approaches to the problems you have solved through your article content is a crucial case, and the kind which could have in a negative way damaged my entire career if I hadn't encountered your blog post. The knowledge and kindness in dealing with everything was crucial. I don't know what I would've done if I had not discovered such a stuff like this. I am able to at this time look forward to my future. Thanks for your time so much for the expert and results-oriented guide. I will not hesitate to refer your blog to anyone who needs direction about this matter.
jordan 6 http://www.jordan6.us.com
Reply curry 6 shoes
6:37 PM on December 24, 2021 
My spouse and i got absolutely peaceful when Edward could finish up his preliminary research from your ideas he gained from your own web page. It's not at all simplistic just to always be giving freely guidelines which often some people have been trying to sell. So we keep in mind we've got you to appreciate for that. Most of the explanations you have made, the easy blog menu, the friendships your site make it possible to create - it's got everything amazing, and it is helping our son in addition to the family do think that subject matter is excellent, which is extraordinarily indispensable. Thanks for the whole lot!
curry 6 shoes http://www.curry6.net
Reply hermes handbags
4:39 AM on December 25, 2021 
I have to convey my gratitude for your kindness in support of visitors who actually need help with this important area. Your very own commitment to passing the message along appeared to be amazingly useful and have encouraged individuals just like me to realize their aims. Your personal insightful publication means much to me and additionally to my mates. Thanks a lot; from all of us.
hermes handbags http://www.hermes-handbags.us.com
Reply giannis antetokounmpo shoes
10:34 AM on December 26, 2021 
My wife and i got very delighted when Louis managed to finish off his reports out of the ideas he got from your web site. It's not at all simplistic to simply choose to be giving for free tips that many the rest could have been trying to sell. Therefore we figure out we've got the website owner to give thanks to because of that. The most important illustrations you have made, the straightforward site menu, the relationships your site assist to promote - it is everything excellent, and it's really making our son in addition to us consider that this idea is amusing, and that's quite important. Many thanks for all the pieces!
giannis antetokounmpo shoes http://www.giannisantetokounmposhoes.us
Reply off white outlet
7:22 PM on December 26, 2021 
Thanks so much for providing individuals with an exceptionally breathtaking chance to read critical reviews from this site. It's always very great and as well , packed with a lot of fun for me personally and my office co-workers to search the blog at the least three times per week to study the new guides you have. Of course, we're always fulfilled concerning the tremendous concepts you give. Certain 2 areas in this post are essentially the most suitable I have had.
off white outlet http://www.offwhites.us.com
Reply jordan shoes
7:25 PM on December 26, 2021 
Thanks for each of your work on this website. My mom really loves working on investigations and it is obvious why. A lot of people hear all concerning the lively means you give both interesting and useful items by means of the web blog and therefore increase response from visitors on this issue then our own child is undoubtedly being taught a great deal. Have fun with the remaining portion of the year. You have been performing a useful job.
jordan shoes http://www.shoesjordan.us.com
Reply yeezy
7:25 PM on December 26, 2021 
I am also commenting to let you know what a nice encounter my girl obtained viewing your web site. She picked up numerous issues, not to mention what it is like to have an incredible giving spirit to get most people with ease know a number of tricky subject matter. You undoubtedly surpassed her desires. Thank you for providing those practical, trustworthy, explanatory and also fun tips about your topic to Sandra.
yeezy http://www.yeezy-supply.us.org
Reply yeezy
6:51 PM on December 28, 2021 
A lot of thanks for all of the efforts on this web page. My niece take interest in setting aside time for internet research and it is easy to see why. A number of us notice all concerning the compelling form you deliver practical suggestions by means of your blog and therefore strongly encourage contribution from people on that situation then our favorite girl is without question becoming educated a lot. Have fun with the rest of the year. You're performing a really good job.
yeezy http://www.yeezy350s.com
Reply nike lebron shoes
4:10 AM on December 29, 2021 
I enjoy you because of your entire work on this site. My aunt delights in making time for investigations and it's really simple to grasp why. My spouse and i know all about the lively tactic you convey invaluable guidelines on the web blog and therefore increase response from website visitors on that article plus our child is actually understanding a whole lot. Take advantage of the rest of the new year. You're the one carrying out a wonderful job.
nike lebron shoes http://www.lebron17s.us
Reply supreme hoodie
10:48 PM on December 29, 2021 
I needed to write you that little bit of note to be able to give thanks over again just for the pleasing ideas you've featured on this site. This has been seriously open-handed of people like you to give easily just what numerous people would've made available as an e-book in making some money for themselves, particularly considering that you could possibly have done it if you ever considered necessary. These points likewise served like the easy way to realize that the rest have the identical dream much like my own to see significantly more concerning this matter. I am certain there are lots of more fun sessions ahead for people who scan through your blog post.
supreme hoodie http://www.supremeshoodie.com
Reply paul george shoes
2:48 AM on December 31, 2021 
I must point out my affection for your kindness giving support to those individuals that should have help with in this area of interest. Your very own dedication to getting the solution all-around turned out to be particularly helpful and have usually encouraged professionals like me to get to their dreams. Your new insightful guidelines signifies a great deal to me and much more to my colleagues. Thanks a ton; from each one of us.
paul george shoes http://www.paulgeorgeshoes.us.com
Reply yeezy boost 380
9:17 PM on December 31, 2021 
I in addition to my pals have already been reading through the best suggestions from the blog while at once I got an awful feeling I had not expressed respect to the web site owner for those strategies. Those men ended up for this reason very interested to learn all of them and now have definitely been taking pleasure in them. Thanks for indeed being so helpful and for utilizing varieties of remarkable resources millions of individuals are really eager to discover. My personal sincere regret for not saying thanks to earlier.
yeezy boost 380 http://www.yeezyboost380.us.com
Reply lebron 18
9:17 PM on December 31, 2021 
I am also writing to make you be aware of what a remarkable experience our child had studying yuor web blog. She mastered such a lot of pieces, with the inclusion of what it's like to have a marvelous teaching nature to let the rest effortlessly fully understand specific complicated matters. You undoubtedly surpassed people's desires. Many thanks for showing the great, trusted, explanatory and in addition cool tips about this topic to Julie.
lebron 18 http://www.lebron18shoes.us
Reply lebron james shoes
9:18 PM on December 31, 2021 
My husband and i felt really excited that Louis managed to finish up his survey from your precious recommendations he acquired in your web page. It's not at all simplistic to just always be releasing steps which usually men and women may have been trying to sell. Therefore we discover we now have you to be grateful to because of that. The specific explanations you have made, the straightforward website navigation, the friendships you will aid to create - it is many wonderful, and it is letting our son in addition to us consider that this content is cool, and that's truly important. Thank you for the whole thing!
lebron james shoes http://www.lebron18.net
Reply yeezy 350
9:19 PM on December 31, 2021 
I simply wished to appreciate you again. I'm not certain what I could possibly have gone through in the absence of these tactics provided by you concerning my situation. It was actually an absolute troublesome setting in my circumstances, but noticing the very well-written mode you dealt with that forced me to weep with delight. Now i'm happier for the information and then hope you find out what an amazing job you are providing teaching most people through the use of your web page. I know that you haven't met all of us.
yeezy 350 http://www.yeezy350s.com
Reply yeezy 500
1:46 AM on January 2, 2022 
I precisely wished to thank you so much once more. I do not know what I would've implemented without the type of tips and hints provided by you on my area of interest. It became the frightening difficulty in my opinion, nevertheless spending time with your professional approach you resolved that made me to leap with joy. Now i'm grateful for your support and even expect you comprehend what a great job you happen to be undertaking training most people via your webblog. I am sure you have never encountered any of us.
yeezy 500 http://www.yeezy-500.us.com
Reply jordan retro
8:56 PM on January 2, 2022 
I intended to create you the very small word in order to thank you very much again on the fantastic strategies you've documented in this article. It is quite remarkably open-handed with people like you to deliver unreservedly what exactly a few people could have distributed as an e book to help with making some dough for their own end, most notably seeing that you could possibly have done it if you wanted. These basics also acted to become easy way to recognize that other individuals have similar fervor just like my very own to grasp significantly more with respect to this condition. I'm sure there are many more pleasant situations in the future for many who looked over your website.
jordan retro http://www.jordan-retro.us.com
Reply curry 6 shoes
6:43 AM on January 3, 2022 
Thank you a lot for giving everyone a very wonderful possiblity to check tips from here. It's usually very ideal and full of a good time for me personally and my office peers to search your blog at the least thrice in one week to read the fresh tips you will have. And indeed, I am usually impressed with the extraordinary strategies you serve. Certain two tips in this posting are in reality the very best we've ever had.
curry 6 shoes http://www.curry6.net
Reply kyrie shoes
1:58 AM on January 4, 2022 
I must convey my respect for your kind-heartedness giving support to folks that really need help on your theme. Your personal commitment to passing the message all around was definitely helpful and has always empowered employees just like me to arrive at their dreams. Your invaluable hints and tips entails a lot a person like me and especially to my peers. Warm regards; from everyone of us.
kyrie shoes http://www.kyrieirving-shoes.us.com
Reply hermes belt
12:21 PM on January 4, 2022 
My spouse and i ended up being very satisfied that Jordan managed to finish up his inquiry with the precious recommendations he received when using the web page. It's not at all simplistic just to possibly be handing out guidelines that many people today could have been selling. And we also grasp we need the writer to thank because of that. These explanations you've made, the simple web site navigation, the relationships you give support to promote - it's most awesome, and it is making our son in addition to the family do think the theme is satisfying, and that's highly essential. Thank you for the whole thing!
hermes belt http://www.hermesbelts.com