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In Their Own Words: Erica ~ Part 2
Posted on August 31, 2017 at 9:53 PM |
For Part I of Erica and Scarlett's breastfeeding journey, click HERE PART II: Making Breastfeeding Work at Work, and Beyond We had opted to co-sleep/bed-share from the beginning
for a variety of reasons (I couldn’t stand the thought of her crying and
needing me, I didn’t want to- and couldn’t at the beginning- get out of bed and
walk down the hall to her room, I had spent her first 5 days without her there
and I would never do that again…). Co-sleeping kept us close, and gave her the
freedom to nurse when she needed to. However, the regular pumping and all-night
nursing were causing me to produce a ton of milk, and she wasn’t using it all
at daycare. I couldn’t miss a single pumping session at school because I was so
engorged. But I was also paranoid of cutting back my pumping, losing my supply
and not being able to do the one thing that I ‘got’ after my birth. After
a couple of months of that, I was losing my mind. Not from breastfeeding; it was a compilation of everything else. I could barely function from exhaustion,
postpartum depression and anxiety, birth trauma resurfacing, not having enough
prep time at work (because of pumping) and feeling like I couldn’t do my job
well enough. The only times I felt calm and happy were when I would pick her up
from daycare and go home and sit on the couch and nurse. Nursing my baby kept
my sanity, and allowed us to check-in with each other. It helped bring me the
clarity to realize I needed to make a career transition so I could be the mom I
wanted to be. I found a job where I could work from home, got a long-term sub,
and didn’t go back to work after spring break. It was the best decision I ever
made. While
I was dealing with the career transition, Scarlett turned 6 months old, that “magic”
starting-solids age, per many different “experts”. I dipped my toes in those
waters, but I didn’t want to. I was scared it would affect our breastfeeding
relationship and it seemed like we’d just gotten good at it. I didn’t want it
to change. So, I didn’t really take “solids” seriously until she was a little
over 7 months old. By then I had an end-date with my job and I knew I would be
home soon. Also, she started giving me all the signs of being ready. She could
sit, she reached for my food, she didn’t do that tongue-sticking-out thing, she
could grab with her fingers (including other kids’ food at daycare). By the
time I was home and she was 8 months, she was eating a little food whenever we
did put some in front of her. It turned out I was worried for nothing. She
loved food, but still loved to nurse as well. Also, she didn’t nurse 3 times a
night anymore; it was only 2—yay for more sleep! Being
home with her allowed me to go back to nursing on demand, which felt so much
more natural! It also gave me the opportunity to donate the thousands of ounces
of milk that I had stockpiled in my deep freezer. I had always wanted to donate
since she had received donor milk in the NICU, but I was apprehensive about
letting any go before then because of the anxiety about losing my supply and
her needing it. Scarlett wasn’t using my frozen milk nearly as fast as I had
been producing it, so we could help three other babies around that time, and we
continue to regularly donate to her friend who is a few months younger than
her. Now that
she’s eating more at each meal, we have started nursing a little less. We nurse
when we wake up, after breakfast/before morning nap, after lunch/before
afternoon nap, at bedtime, and whenever else she may need a pick-me-up.
Occasionally she will still wake up once (or more) during the night if she
needs me, and I’m there for her when she does. I don’t pump regularly anymore,
which is a great relief! I still have quite a stockpile that we are donating
and it feels nice to be able to help others. A few
people have asked me if I’m going to keep nursing Scarlett now that she’s 1
(that “magic” number again). I tell them that I’ll nurse her until she doesn’t
need it. I also tell them that I won’t have any more kids, in large part
because of how everything happened last year. So, since she is my only baby and
nursing is our special thing that we got after we missed out on so much and
endured so much trauma, we will ride it out until it doesn’t feel right. Maybe
another year? Maybe another 2 years? I’m very okay with not knowing when the
journey will end. This has been the greatest gift of our birth experience, and
I’m happy seeing and feeling the continued joy it brings us. For others who
want to breastfeed longer than is typical, I say to go for it! You will never
regret being the one who can be your baby’s everything. For Part I of Erica and Scarlett's breastfeeding journey, click HERE Disclaimer: The material
included in this video is for informational purposes only. It is not intended
nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The reader
should always consult her or his healthcare provider to determine the
appropriateness of the information for their own situation. Krystyna and
Bruss Bowman and Bowman House, LLC accept no liability for the content of this
site, or for the consequences of any actions taken on the basis of the
information provided. This blog and related videos contain information
about our classes available in Chandler, AZ and Payson, AZ and is not the
official website of The Bradley Method®. The views contained on our blog and
videos do not necessarily reflect those of The Bradley Method® or the American
Academy of Husband-Coached Childbirth®. Birthing From
Within and Bradley Method® natural childbirth classes offered in Arizona:
convenient to Chandler, Tempe, Ahwatukee, Gilbert, Mesa, Scottsdale |
Categories: Breastfeeding, Breastfeeding Awareness Month, Breastfeeding Challenges, In Their Own Words, World Breastfeeding Week
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